Tai Chi Long Form Just Got Shorter

Well...not really.

But....it feeeeeeeeeels shorter.

I have been waiting for the day that the 108 move form did not seem like an impossible task. I knew that eventually the form would seem shorter to me. That is how it has always been when I am learning a new pattern. When the students are learning a new Okinawa Kenpo form I ask "Does it feel shorter?". Pieces of the form seem familiar and patterns are emerging. The patterns were always there...I just did not see them.

Progress!

Since I wrote about my decision to continue Tai Chi, I took a deep breath and relaxed a bit. I am looking forward to discovering where this path will lead me.

Martial Arts: Providing Options to Prevent School Bullying

Several posts on this blog have been focused on the topic of school bullying. I read and reviewed Jodee Blanco's books on her quest to prevent school bullying. I have had discussions online and in the dojo regarding school bullying. I searched the Internet for bully-prevention programs and found few that uttered the word self-defense. I keep asking myself the same question. What role can martial arts play in the prevention of school bullying?

I came to the conclusion that Martial Arts Training provides options.

I am a parent, a karate instructor and co-owner of a traditional dojo. School bullying is a complex topic that affects children, parents, teachers, school administrations and medical professionals. In studying a martial art, we learn control, self-defense and courtesy. Students are taught to be respectful, kind and compassionate. In our dojo, kids who start fights or engage in bullying behavior are asked to leave.

Parents walk through our door searching for help for their child who is a target of school bullying. Here are a few examples.

Student at a Crossroad

A few months after the dojo opened (1995), a parent brought his young (10-11 years old) son to take karate lessons. The parent approached my husband and asked if he would take his son as a student. Before my husband could answer, the man continued his story. His young son was in trouble at school. The young boy was constantly picked on and tormented. One day the young boy took a butter knife to school in his backpack with the intention to use it against the school bully. The teacher found the knife and luckily, no one got hurt. The parent wanted his son to learn self-defense. He gave us a warning that local parents did not want their kids to be around his son.

What did my husband do? He accepted the young boy as a student. Members of the dojo were upset by my husband’s decision. My husband stood firm knowing that this type of kid would benefit the most from the martial arts. He was taught options as an alternative to violence. The young boy loved karate and found a place in the dojo community. He made friends and his confidence and self-esteem improved. He worked hard and eventually received the rank of brown belt.

A few years after he began training, the teenage boy attended a local carnival. He was standing up for his sister and was jumped by five older kids. Our student was badly bruised and suffered a compound fracture. He told us that he kept fighting even though his bone was sticking out of his arm. He did not return to karate due to the injury and subsequent bone infection.

Students that Miss the Point

A parent brings his young son to the dojo. This young man was bullied at school. The father was overly enthusiastic and excited to have his son learn martial arts. After eight months, we were informed that the boy had “learned enough”. The student left the dojo. A few weeks later, we discover that this boy has become the bully. He made his father very proud. We were heartbroken that we did not realize the hidden agenda.


Students that Blossom

Parents bring their shy, intelligent, compassionate children to the dojo. They are hoping that karate will give them confidence and make them self-assured. When these students first arrive at the dojo, they are afraid to demonstrate individually. I watch these students emerge as role models. They lead drills, help beginning students and assist in class.

This blog post has been sitting in the draft folder for over a week. It does not feel complete but I decided to post it as it stands. I did not like the word prevent and struggled to find a suitable alternative. Perhaps the words deter, stop, thwart, foil or avoid could have been used. I will continue to research and discuss the topic of school bullying. The post reflects my current opinions and I realize my beliefs may evolve.

I would love to hear your thoughts on the topic.

Can martial arts help prevent school bullying? Is the benefit self-defense, confidence, self-esteem or a combination of all three? Is karate training perceived as violent and aggressive? Should school age children learn self-defense? Does your dojo advertise bully prevention? Have you taught students who became the Bully? What can we do as parents? What can we do as karate instructors? Has your child's school presented a bully prevention program?

So many questions....

Grandmaster Seikichi Odo

Distraction and Yellow Page Scammers

I consider myself an observant person. I notice things and remember. My husband has called me at work to help him find something at home. Frustrating as this phone call can be, I usually remember where the item can be found. I try to keep myself aware of my surroundings and not be distracted.

This week I failed to be observant and aware because I was distracted. On Tuesday, my Dad had a cardiac catheterization. They were checking his heart to determine if he has a blockage. I was worried about him and waiting to hear the results of his test. The phone rang at work and I was expecting it to be my Mom with the results. On the other end of the phone was a Scammer who happened to call when I was distracted. The phone call went something like this:

Scammer: “This is a courtesy call to update your free online business yellow page listing.”

He read off the company’s name, address and phone number.

Me: “Yes, that is correct.”

Scammer: “Thank you for verifying the information. In order to update the listing in the computer, I need you to answer a few recorded questions to confirm. I will dial the number and help with the prompts.”

He dialed a number and continued.

Scammer: “Please answer the questions loud and clear. I will hit all the prompts.”

Faint Recording: State the name of the Company

I could faintly hear the recording.

Scammer: “Name of company”

I replied.

Faint Recording: State the physical address

Scammer: “They are looking for the address.”

I replied. A few questions were asked requesting basic information. Each time the Scammer would help by stating the question.

Scammer: “The final question verifying that you approve the update.”

Very Faint Recording: “….approve…..$39.95…..months”

Me: HEY! Wait a minute! I heard the recording mention $39.95.

CLICK

The Scammer ended the call.

On a normal day, I would not have answered the questions. I know about the phone frauds for online Yellow Page listings. Why did I answer the questions? There is only one reason I can think of….I was distracted. It can happen so quickly. I let my guard down and gave a Scammer a window of opportunity.

I am irritated at myself and wondered how often I get distracted. Am I easily distracted? I did not think so…but maybe I am…I hope not.

I write this post as a reminder to myself...pay attention.

Summer is Supposed to be Relaxing…Right?

I could not wait until school let out. I imagined free evenings with no homework or after school activities. I thought I would have more time and less stress.

I must have been dreaming…

My daughter loves summer camp. She wants to go full time (M-F 8:15-5:15). I guess I should not have been worried. The original plan was for her to go to camp three days per week and her Nana’s house two days per week. Camp is full of activities, field trips, swimming and many kids. I am happy that she loves camp but the extra two days require more money and more driving.

In addition to camp, my daughter will be rehearsing for a play for the next five weeks. There were over fifty kids who auditioned and only twenty-five speaking parts. She was in the play for the last three summers but was not sure if she wanted to participate this year. She auditioned and was excited when she found out that she got a small speaking role. The rehearsals are Monday - Thursday from 6:00 pm – 9:00 pm. The rehearsals during the last week are every day and last until at least 10:00 pm. Parents are required to volunteer and help with ticket sales, set construction (9 different scenes), raffle items and advertising.

I spend a lot of time in a car. Driving back and forth to camp, to work and to play practice. I did not even mention my full time job, dojo responsibilities, tai chi, the gym, annual karate seminar or housework. I have a few vacation days scheduled near the Fourth of July. During that time, I will be helping replace a roof on the garage. We have a detached three-car garage with office. It is a big roof but not too steep. I helped replace the roof on our house. The best part about this project is that we are getting a dumpster. It will be a great opportunity to clean out the house and throw things away.

Tonight at play practice, the parents will begin construction on a shark skeleton made out of wire, pool noodles and paper mache.

I am tired already.